Just Sad

After reading this story,

http://news.independent.co.uk/world/americas/article340826.ece

I feel compelled to let more people know how bad things are. I feel that not enough is said, whether on television or in papers or even in public discussions with friends or families about the after effects of coming home from a military deployment where your Mothers, Fathers, Sisters, Brothers, Neighbors, Friends, Co-Workers, etc. have been shipped off for combat duty.

I blame the drug "Larium" the military uses to combat malaria as one of the main reasons this guy offed himself. Larium is the main ingredient in the drug Mefloquine issued to Soldiers and Marines all over the world when deployed to third world countries. Mefloquine is taken in pill form once a week while deployed. To counteract the effects of the drug, soldiers are given Primoquine everyday for 2 weeks after returning home. Both drugs are Larium based. Although Mefloquine and Primoquine are the best possible defense from getting malaria there are alternatives such as doxycycline or atovaquone/proguanil (Malarone). If you re-read the story above after looking at the Larium info web site below, you’ll see that every thing this guy went through is a reflection of the adverse effects associated with the combination of Larium and PTSD.

It seems to me that the Government refuses to deal with the overwhelming fact that Larium has damaging long-term effects on the soldiers taking it. There are no warnings issued, there is no counseling given, there is no predetermination, or screening done by the Army medics as to weather or not the soldier being issued Larium pills has had any previous mental instability which is known to heighten the horrible results of this debilitating drug. They would rather allow everyone to think that PTSD is the cause for all of the, mood disorders and depression that almost all returning troops feel and display after taking it. Combine this drug with the horrors of combat and every Marine, Soldier, Airman, and Seaman becomes a ticking time bomb waiting to go off, just like Douglas Barber.

One of the guys I went to Mogadishu with killed himself years after getting out of the military and after returning to his home state. Although I didn’t know it at the time, I found out that he had attempted to kill himself twice while we were still stationed together at Ft Carson. I found out about his suicide from his 3rd wife who I had never met. She found my number while packing all of his things up a few months after he died. It is believed that the day he killed himself he was on his way to his house to shoot her and her son but stopped half way there on the side of the freeway to shoot him self in the head before hurting anyone else. It’s my belief that he was dealing with the effects of Larium and PTSD and momentarily had a realization of what he was doing, and who he used to be. He just couldn’t deal with any of it anymore. But who am I, not a doctor or shrink, just a friend who wants to believe that he really was the great friend I knew all those years ago but couldn’t cope with the same crap that I was dealing with too.

It is a difficult process to come back to your home and your family and readjust to the fact that you don’t have an M-16 in bed with you every night. The family that took you back into their home is happy with the realization that your home safe and sound and in one piece but that is all they see and realize. The truth is, it is harder to readjust to everyday life back in the States in one piece than it was to adjust to getting shot at everyday. Getting shot at was the easy part, you were trained for it, and you knew it was coming! Coming back home and going back to school, or finding a job and going back to work takes on a different meaning altogether because no one can relate to what you’ve seen and done. You watch people walk along the street or through a hallway, or in their car and you envision a sign above each and everyone of their heads that reads” Ignorance is Bliss” because you feel as though they have no clue as to what the world is really like. There’s nothing you can say to anyone about what you’ve done with out thinking that they’re:
A) Going to think your full of shit, but what the fuck do they know they were not there
B) Going to think that every word you say is truth and then you’ll be able to say whatever the fuck you want and they’ll believe you
C) What the fuck does it matter because there is nothing you can say that they’ll be able to relate to so why waste your breath, just smile nod and say ”Yeah, I was in (pick your war or conflict)”

If you happen to know someone who was on a military deployment to a combat area just let him or her know that, although you may not know what they’ve been through, there is always help if they need it. Call them right now or e-mail them this and say, “Hi, I just read this story and I want to talk to you about it. Or show it to you” Send them to some of the links listed below. They helped me because I was able to see that I was not alone and that it was not all my fault for feeling the way I did. It’s easy to sit back and say “I just did my job” or, “I did what I needed to do to get through it” but it still tears you apart.

Douglas Barber did not know that he’d have an effect on me but he did, I felt the need to tell you his story and I hope you’ll pass it along.

Larium Action USA is a group I became affiliated with after realizing my own problem associated with taking Larium.

http://www.lariaminfo.org/


From Larium Action USA: a collection of quotes and bits of stories from people who've suffered the effects of Larium

http://www.lariaminfo.org/support/quotes.shtml


Link to a Consumer Reports document describing the ill effects that Mefloquine has

http://www.consumerreports.org/cro/health-fitness/drugs-supplements/common-drugs-hidden-dangers-106/highrisk-drugs.htm


Story of Marine Veteran discharged after seeking help with the effects of Larium

http://www.vva.org/TheVeteran/2005_11/feature_Lariam.htm